Here you will find another way that would reflect the intense living experiences any person facing a difficult diagnosis goes through and is in urgent need to make a decision.
All those who were hit by something like this lived intensely all the immediate emotions and desperate thoughts.
The text is written according to the SDT-Online requirements so as to render naturally the living experiences sequences lived by the main character.
"The medical cabinet door opens suddenly. X moves through the sea of people waiting quietly standing in the same cabinet, as she was remote controlled. She cannot see anyone. Passes the front desk blindly, failing to stop to pay for consultation.
She reaches the car and, with robot movements, opens the door and gets into the driver’s seat. Sitting in the car, with the stack of Imaging tests resting against the steering wheel she lets her feelings loose for the first time.
She starts to cry. Tears are flowing in streams on her face. Her body shudder, curly hair covering her face. She cries for a few minutes.
Just as suddenly as it started she stops crying. Like a baby she wipes her eyes and face with her palms. Gets a tissue from the bag and blows her nose. She arranges her stylishly hairdos hair and fixes her blouse under the dark coat.
Only the red congested nose and watery and sad eyes still betrays any emotion.
She put the key in contact and steps firmly on the gas pedal.
She parks near the park behind the condominium building. Fresh green trees, sprouting up, make her forget for a second why she stopped.
Then she opens the door and, for a moment, is thinking to leave the folder in the car. She takes the large bag from the back seat and puts all the analyses and the dossier in it.
She calls the intercom. The old and heavy door opens with a strong squeak. As usual, she passes by the elevator and climbs the large, spiral stone stairs. At an easy pace she gets to the first floor, then the second faster and, as she advances, increase the pace. Up to 5th floor she already runs. Despite wearing a skirt and heels she runs effortlessly. Breathes rapidly, mostly due to nervousness.
In the door of the apartment stands a young man with olive skin and dark eyes, almond-shaped. He looks like an indian. He smiles with his whole face and makes way for the woman to get into the house.
She leaves the hallway and enters the first room.
In the waiting room there are two more people. She takes off her shoes and puts on the slippers which were waiting for her near the hanger. From the next room shows up radiating, and young and beautiful the young man’s wife. The entire atmosphere in the room is full of serenity.
- Hi!
- Hi, how are you doing? asks the host.
- I come straight from the doctor.
- Come to my office, she says and moves forward.
X holds the bag with the test results against the wall.
The two beautiful women walk down the aisle towards the Office. From the rear they appear as two thin and graceful shapes: one blonde and one redhead, one moving relaxed, the other wearing the elegant coat and slippers.
In the Office there are two large soft beige leather armchairs. It is shortly after noon and the sun shines powerfully, making the armchairs seem made of gold. They both take a sit comfortably in the armchairs.
Calm, like narrating a movie, X starts to speak.
- After 4 hours of waiting at the doctor's office, within 10 minutes into our meeting, he concluded that I have no chance, and that it doesn't make sense for me to get surgery. And that I should go home and start the chemo without delay, on Monday, to make it a little easier for me. He gave me no chance.
Then, as if she was not talking about her and her life, she calmly continued.
- I decided together with my husband to go to Vienna to get surgery and then continue back home with the treatment as they prescribe them. The Austrian doctors at least gave me between 2 and 3 years.
- Don’t do this! These treatments are death sentence, said the wife vehemently. Y told you so too!
- Yes, but he did not give me a clear alternate.
The door opened and Y steps into the office. He takes X in his arms and gives her a warm hug. Then he stands still.
- X decided to go to Vienna for surgery and then follow the allopathic treatment. The doctor here gave her no chance.
His black eyes screamed reproachfully and his words meat the same:
- Are you out of your mind? This is certain death! You don't know what you're doing!
- It seems to be an extremely aggressive form and I don't have time to wait and see. Do you know an alternate version in which someone survived? Can I talk to that person?
Do you think I want this thing? she said with fading voice. No, but I have two small children, one not yet 2 years old and if I do not hurry or I make a mistake he will not remember me.
X looks at him with a lot of hope. In fact, all her hope was in him. To support her going through the hell. With them by her side X was sure she can endure anything. She was waiting for a sign, a smile, on his young face. But his face remained like a stone.
- It's your decision. You are free to do what you want. But I will not help you. With nothing.
The office fell on deep silence for a few moments. Then he continued:
- When do you leave for surgery? He asked.
- Within maximum 3 weeks, X answers.
- You can come here to work every day if you want. No pay. He then left the office quietly.
- I told you Y’s opinion on this, says his wife. I too believe it is not a good idea to get that poison in your body. It is thoroughly damaging for the entire body. It is rare anybody last much longer after getting it.
- I am free, as Y said. This is what I feel it is right and I want to do it. I can’t see any viable alternate. Maybe I am wrong, X continued, but it is a mistake I take responsibility for. This decision calms me down.
The two women embrace and smile to each other. Then they exit the office and each goes in a different room.
X changes her office clothing with the workout gear she carries in her back pack. She lays down on her back on the purple mat and tries to relax. She usually does this very quickly.
Now she cannot gets thoughts out of her head. She feels abandoned. She gets up and tries to meditate.
X closes her eyes and takes a deep breath and soon her thoughts had scattered.